My young bride is a crazy little thing and that's why I love her, but lately she's into playing a hide-and-seek game I think could be potentially dangerous to us. How can I put this delicately? She likes to hide little things in the nooks and crannies of her perfect little body, and I have to search them out under her clothes when I get home from work and eat them.

At first they were little jelly candies and such and I'd find them in the crook of her elbow or down her cleavage. Too easy! Now she's taken to hiding things in wild places and some spots where the sun don't shine, and I think it's not healthy. She's a zany and lovable nutcase and I don't want to rain on her parade, but I don't want to play this game anymore. It's not exactly healthy for me to fetch them.

Get up on the ringmaster's stool, my friend, and take command! Introduce a titillating new game, so you control the rules. Your wife will be jazzed by the pro-active stance and forget about her old game which, like a cute TV sitcom, was driven to extremes by lack of a replacement.

No ideas in your own head? Steal from the best. Hit Chapters "Sexuality" section located within the Health and Well-Being (and cleverly hidden behind the escalator, in the store by Polo Park). Look for the special books that detail a new game or adventure for every night of the year. People spend years in their basements dreaming up the likes of this stuff up for eager bridegrooms.

One of my best guy friends is going out with this girl who doesn't like the idea of me and him hanging out -- and we've grown up together. I love him to death, and he seems to like me. We've fooled around a few times which I know is wrong, because he has a girlfriend.

I want to be with him, and the way he talks he's so unhappy with her. Should I lay off and just be friends or try to make him understand I'm the one for him?

You're sleeping with the guy and you wonder why his poor girlfriend wants him to stay away from you? She can smell your vixen perfume and your little bag of tricks!

Mr. Two-Timer has no need to break up with this girlfriend, even if he isn't totally happy, because he can whine and complain on your soft shoulders and then have sex with you, too.

What if you do manage to steal him away? You know he'll cheat because he's done it with you. Plus he knows you're also into sneaking, so he won't feel too bad cheating on you once things get a little boring.

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